This week its all about the "S" word "SEX"

I love this scripture and these verses. I just want to start out with this:

"Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. 

The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.

Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency” (1 Cor 7:2-5). 

With that being said, I hope that we understand how marriage is something that is very important. Let us turn our attention to sex and gender differences.

Gender and Physiology 

Men and women are different. These differences are something that we debate on occasionally, when it comes to sex, they are real and very clear. However, this is something that many couples fail to reflect on and integrate into an understanding of how to be successful partners. 

Arousal patterns

As men we are quick to be aroused and also quick to achieve orgasm. The "spike" rises sharply and drops off just as sharply. Research has found that "men are especially aroused visually". Women are aroused more slowly and after achieving orgasm, they tend to remain at a high plateau of arousal before dropping off.

As you have read above these are very different physiological patterns. NO wonder why it is very challenging for couples to really experience mutual satisfaction. We cannot and must not ignore these; instead we must and should incorporate them into our lovemaking process. The simplest way to do this is, regardless of who initiates the foreplay, is for men to focus on pleasuring their wives, bringing them to an initial orgasm before focus is given to bringing the male to orgasm. 

If you don't mind me, I would like to share some of my views on this matter. Being raised as a Latter-Day Saint is a wonderful thing, as we are taught that sexual intimacy is very sacred and it's between a man and a woman legally and lawfully married. In some LDS homes this topic is not allowed. I will say no. This is a topic that should be spoken about at home. Why, you may ask? Because if your kids learn it somewhere else, they won't feel comfortable talking to you about it since you never talked to them about it. I get that we all want to be that parent who their child loves. But this is one of the most important things to gain that and build great communication patterns with them. The "S" word is not supposed to be a taboo in LDS homes.

Parents need to know that “It is not just a talk about sexuality; it’s a conversation about our God-given feelings and our aspirations of what we can become as families.” —Lee Gibbons. Whatever your hesitations or fears are, it is vital that you discuss sexual intimacy with your children on an ongoing basis. Children and teenagers are regularly bombarded with damaging ideas about sex, and you have the opportunity to help them create a positive, gospel-driven understanding of sexual intimacy.

So my invitation is for parents to teach their children about the "S" word at home instead of them hearing it from an outside source. You want to be a good parent, then become your child's best friend.